Seems like a stroke is likely along with other terrible side effects
Edit: He presented within an hour and later expired. Don’t do this.
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Update Time!
So it turns out that the cream that I tried before wasn’t lidocaine. It was 10% trolamine salicylate. So, I made a trip to Walgreen’s and picked up a tube of 4% lidocaine gel. Whaddya know, it works way better than any previous attempts. After applying and covering with saran wrap and a disposable glove, I waited 30 minutes. Much better numbness. I guess the bottom line is that store bought lidocaine works just fine as long as its kept wet for a longer period.
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Two hours gets you maximum effect, basically full numbness if you occluded it properly.
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Yep. It’s just nice to know that store bought cream is an option for people who can’t easily get a PMK. Also it’s a lot cheaper! Sorry for killing you bottom line dude! 
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I’m surprised you could. Have heard a lot of bad experiences trying to get lidocaine in the US (even though it’s not illegal).
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You can buy injectable lido on chewy when you buy Fido some treats.
Huh… There you go.
I just get my pharmacists topical numbing agent which I’ve discussed here before.
Hi, which pharmacy, and how did it go? Definitely in need of a good lido.