How do you make someone weep at the taste of stale white bread?
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Sourdough made from a human dervived yeast culture?
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Have you tried asking politely?
You could try starving them for like a week or two in a dark room before letting them have it
You could add further psychological elements to this one, like the only light source in the room is a spot light pointing at the bread behind a glass barrier. That way they can watch it getting stale in real time as the feelings of isolation and hunger and eventually starvation set in, and once enough time passes you lift the glass. This is just an example, it could also be something much better
Or perhaps some kind of pavlovian torture device that force feeds them the bread and promotes tears somehow, perhaps through pain or like a chemical inducement to the eyes, attempting to condition them over time to naturally start making tears when they taste the bread.
Basically a device that forces them to taste bread and then blows air through one of these things onto their eyes:
Tear Blower
Or, I suppose you could potentially take a more direct route, and just program a device which can detect that they are eating stale white bread and then shocks the bejeebers out of their tear glands
You could just hand them the bread, inform them that they have to eat it and if they don’t weep openly they’ll be barred for life from buying any more DT implants. That’d do the trick for me
Why do I get the feeling none of that was the answer you were looking for?
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To be honest, American bread is so sweet, I think making it stale may improve its taste. It was the biggest thing which completely screwed me when I first went there. Now I know to order sour dough.
And I have clearly been drinking and missed the point of this post!
PS no one else calls turkey strips cooked to charcoal, bacon either! 
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Oh and so I am not being just negative, Key Lime Pie is the best dessert in the world. Sorry France, but it is.
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Why do you want to make someone weep with bread? What am I missing?
Also, have you tried twiddling your dials, Amal?
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Making some white bread with about three times the sugar; that’s just candy.
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Find someone for whom it was all their mother had to give them growing up. Then after years of separation, reunite them with their mother who still has nothing more to give them.
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you kidnap them, every day you give them 3 good meals and meet all of their basic needs, provide them with amenities and entertainment but never any affection, but at night you force them to eat a piece of stale bread while you whip them and kick them in the stomach.
you do this every day for 6 years until finally unlocking the door to their prison and vanish never to be caught for your crimes.
3 years after their reintegration into society and hours of therapy you send your accomplice in, a person who is their exact type in a partner, they bond, everything seems perfect until 2 years after dating they move in, the thing your accomplice does is wake them up at night pushing a piece of stale bread into their mouth.
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Alternatively, wait 20 years or so, then invite me over and toast some bread, talk about how good it smells, eat it and talk about how good it tastes and how much you enjoy some fancy French butter…
And yes, I’m willing to give up toast for a mechanical existence.
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Oldboy esq
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