Fun story about being a cyborg

Lounge
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We have here in the newer trains sests with a big table. I sit down, put my computer on the desk, put the KBR 1 reader in the USB port. A person, who was sitting on the other site of the corridor looked at me.
I put the reader on my hand ‘Beep’
The person went away…
1st person scared away…

a few month later - very crowded train - a person took the seat next to me. The most times, when I’m in Vienna I have my “keep calm and get chipped” shirt or the “dangerous things” shirt. I unlocked my phone with the flexNT - person stood up and took an other seat.
2nd person scared away…

I think in Austria many people are afraid of the technology…

The most kids are intrested, when I show them tricks with a magnet - snd very often they say: “you have a magnet implanted”

13 Likes
43

I had the men in dark suits show up an my Jr High (circa 1975) when I created a mockup nuke that fit in a briefcase. I had to explain that these were not an actual shaped charges, it was just clay and that this was not fissionable material, it was a croquet ball.

2 Likes
44

tenor (13)

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Semi-derogatory terms are always fun with these. Depending with the tech/magic, you could do something crazy specific that’s interesting. Like if the magic has a sound like a tick, people could call them something pertaining to clocks. Clockwork men/women/soldiers, clockers, tickers, etc. that or just non specific metal men.

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In their defense, it was yellow. eye roll

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Was it also made of cake?

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Yes right! .
Regards.

1 Like
49

Wait… does everyone who gets their gall bladder yanked out get a titanium spring?

…do I have titanium in me I was I unaware of?

I have conflicted feelings

On the one hand, cool I guess? Right?
On the other, I feel like I should be told when you’re going to leave souvenirs inside my body

50

Or plastic. I think the doctor was a little weirded out when the only question I had was would I be getting titanium.

There’s a little tube that connects gall bladder to liver. They put two spring clamps on it, then cut it in between the clamps. Pull the tube and clamp out of the incision, remove the clamp, and then drain the gall bladder so that it’s small enough to come out of the incision. The other clamp is left in to keep the tube closed until it heals.

This is the procedure for doing it lacroscopically. I don’t think anybody does a full blown open your guts up wide enough to get the surgeons hands in there anymore.

1 Like
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Interesting. I had some small clamps installed at one point and they seemed to make a big deal out of making sure I knew and providing a card with the serial number of each clamp and a map of where they were.

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Once I couldn’t find my uni ID for a while. I met my tutor at the gate in the morning and told her I will be a few minutes late, as I need to fill out a form to get a temporary entry pass. She asked the security instead to let me in and we went to class together.
On the way to the classroom I told her I stayed up late to get ready to my presentation and how great progress I made with my project.

When it was my turn to present I told her I needed a few minutes to get ready.
She thought I was just bragging about my project in the morning and wanted to call me out on it.

I tried to explain that I stayed in the uni library until close and wanted to pick up my prints on the way out… when I noticed I was missing my card.

(So all my data is in the cloud, all I need to do is to couple my implant with my username and password on one of the xerox machines and press print. I was working on multiple computers the night before so the alternative solution would be to log in to all the computers I used, email the files to her, log in to another computer with her account and then print all my staff.)

I couldn’t tell her what I put in brackets, because the conversation was something like this:

-I need a few minutes to print, I miss my card…
-Here is mine, print from this!
-No, I don’t need your card, I need a few minutes and I sort it out.
-But you said you don’t have a card, you trying to make me fool or what??!!
-I don’t need a card.
-So how you gonna print?
-With my hand.
-??? Hand-print??
-Not literally, but literally.
-Okay, so show me.
So I lifted up my hand…
-What is in your hand??
-Nothing… it’s actually my finger, but you don’t want to see that I guess.
-You guessed wrong! I do!
So I had to flip the bird to my tutor, my flexNT was installed in my middle finger. Then she warned my to write a report about my behaviour, that I agreed on if she followed me to the library to put the situation in context… My friend overheard this conversation from the other room and came to ask what we were yelling about.
-About this: ..i., (I flipped the bird to her as well.)
-Awww, your chip! By the way, you left your ID card in the studio the other day, I picked it up for you, here it is…
By that point I was sweating, my tutor was red-angry with me, but my friend explained she saw me printing with my implant before.

Then we found a xerox machine, I demonstrated how to print with the implant, I said what I wrote in brackets above and got a good feedback on my project.

6 Likes
53

I just found out this ain’t never gonna happen: the company that made the stimulator whose electrodes I have inside of me tanked last year :slight_smile:

http://www.implantable-device.com/2019/12/08/gerd-treatment-endostim-is-liquidated/

I’m kinda glad I never got it after all.

1 Like