I don't want to be a burden

Dm me Amal. The doctor I found online is not judgemental, does not have “shaman psychedelic trip advisors”.

I feel he genuinely wants people to get better. He is based out of my state, and does across border prescriptions. I don’t want to take so much K that I trip balls. And they support that.

It’s genuinely made a significant positive difference in my life.

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Also, I have a plan with them, after 6 months most patients can quit, some have monthly, or weekly doses. They are very open and the dude Dr. seems very genuine.

Edit: also part of the reason I’m not too active here anymore. I only have a phone. I fried computer. So I never get online anymore.

(If anyone can suggest a good rig to play CSGO, let know. I’m pretty computer illiterate)


I just woke up (GTM+2), I̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶ ̶b̶e̶t̶t̶e̶r̶.̶ I feel great.
While I still have a clear mind and drink my coffee I’ll look around for the help I should get.
Thanks a lot, You may be the reason I’m still alive. Last night what intense.
Will never forget you.

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Well make it a point to lay down some roots and stick around here then…

You called yourself a weirdo, I can’t think of a better description of the people I want to recruit for our little menagerie :sunglasses:

All of the above and getting help is good place to start with the clear head

Perhaps a change or username is in order?
I self deprecate regularly but “I am not good” is no nickname to have

Come up with something funny, or weird and random… definitely nerdy… also gotta pick a good avatar… because you are your avatar as far as I’m concerned lol

Until told otherwise, this is what you look like to me now

edit… I might also also read your replies like a cheesy Elvis impersonator… sorry-not-sorry

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I’ll just use my main account. This is just a throwaway. I hope I’ll never need it again.
I’m quite ashamed I let myself down this bad.
An acctualy I look like @amal, with brown hair

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You didn’t! You should be quite proud of yourself actually. You had the courage to seek the help you needed when you needed it! A lot of people aren’t so brave.

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Last I checked your probably human…

I mean… to be fair, this is one of the few places where your human percentages may vary a bit… but Still

This, I usually bottle things up and mask everything with childish humor….

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The amount of support on this forum is just amazing! You guys all rock. Including you @iamnotgoodpleasehelp !

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Felt like I should drop this here

I genuinely enjoy kurzgesagt… but sometimes the make pretty useful videos besides “nuking the moon”

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Having suffered with depression and chronic pain myself, I’ve come to realize that it’s just a feeling, an all feelings pass eventually. Plus what really keeps me going is simply that I want to see what happens next.

As Marcus Aurelius said: Take comfort that there is no pain that is either unbearable, or everlasting.

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I’ve heard it can be very helpful at “resetting” you. Especially for chronic pain. My go to reset for years was psilocybin mushrooms, stopped working eventually though. The worst part for me is that I have an autoimmune disease that’s known to cause pain, but no doctor seems to ever believe that I’m in constant pain. I have to pay a shady doctor cash to get any kind of proper medicine. Seems to be getting a lot better now that I quit smoking. I haven’t taken any kind of painkiller since February. There’s always hope for anything.

This.
And another thing that might sound morbid but works fine for me in bad times - if things get even worse, I might still just kill myself. Like, I don’t do now, because let’s just see what happens, and I still have that option afterwards. Since many suicidal actions are quite impulsive, it actually helps. Just like Friedrich Nietzsche once said “The thought of suicide is a great consolation: by means of it one gets through many a dark night.”
If this sounds like a really bad advice, feel free to delete this post, don’t wanna spread bad ideas here.

I wasn’t going to mention it, but this is a coping mechanism I’ve leaned heavily into from time to time

The wording and framing might be a bit different, but it weirdly removes a lot of stress that actually backs you into that corner

I lean into the ADHD gamify strategies because my brain…

But I turn it into a, “let’s see how much I can take before I get there, let’s go for a high score”

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I don’t think that I have anything to add. But I want to say that I’ve also experienced depression and despair. And I hope that things start to get better on your end soon.

I know that some parts of the world are going crazy right now and I hope that this is not affecting you directly. If so, do what you can to get to safety.

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I’m a bit late, but i hope you can find the help you need. And you can work on start loving yourself first. YOU are the most important person in YOUR LIFE, but you need some directions to see that. Don’t ever let anybody tell you you are not good enough. Only what you think about yourself matters. Cause you are good enough. That is your foundation. Work on making it a steady one and you can build the rest on top of that.
Good luck and don’t hesitate to reach put for help!

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I take propranolol to help with this. It doesn’t have any mental side effects, but it gets rid of the physical feelings That accompanies self revulsion. It is a beta blocker so it’s easy to get prescribed. I am also on antidepressants, took a long time to find the right one.

Hey buddy, Just checking in to see how you are going and to let you know there are people out there still thinking about you and you are more than just a passer by…

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Agreed,

They did say this was just a throwaway account @Pilgrimsmaster and they were going to return to their regular account :man_shrugging:t2:

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Yeah cherrs, I just wanted to confirm that is the case and know that they have not fallen off our radar

20221008_124625

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