The antiđŸš«-derailment🚃 & threadđŸ§” hijackingđŸ”« threadđŸ§” ⁉

Lounge
5579

I get that you’re strong and that you’ve found a good place for yourself emotionally Coma, but a lot of people aren’t in a comfortable spot like that. There’s some serious “let them eat cake” vibes from the way you lay out your viewpoint. We can’t just pretend racism and sexism don’t exist and muscle through, that’s not a viable path forward. If you don’t understand, it’s totally cool. Just recognize that some people have different experiences from you.

Just because someone doesn’t want to shoulder the burden of adversity quietly or with clever quips, doesn’t mean they’re weak.

I also definitely don’t think the “offended crew” are the ones escalating tensions :joy: they’re walking on eggshells every day out of fear that belligerent majority members don’t freak out.

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5580

I definitely don’t! I know both of it exists, and both is shit
 I’m just pretty sure racism and sexism are extraordinarily rare in this forum. So I think there is little need to see them in every sentence here.

Most people do. But instead of assuming “eat cake vibes”, one could maybe see that there is a way to come to a “comfortable spot” “like me”. Hah, btw
 it’s definitely not comfortable to be treated like that regularly, I just found a way to get along with it. And I thought that, if I was able to, others might be as well. Just wanted to offer some change to a point of view
 but that’s seemingly not wanted. I met people who are very happy with being a victim, because it takes away lots of responsibility. Not saying that’s happening here, but like I said, I know such people and I just hate that.

In general, yes, definitely. In this forum, it’s the other way round, I think. To be honest, I don’t care a tiny bit if someone here is gay or transgender, what colour their skin has, what kind of sex they have or anything else. That’s private. If people want to talk about that, fine, if not, fine as well - I just don’t give a fuck about all that. And I definitely won’t freak out about it.
But the last two or three times something escalated here, it was the reactions of the people you assume are “walking on eggshells”. They were the first ones being aggressive, insulting and such.

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5581

That’s fair.

5582

As a heterosexual white European male I am most definitely not in anyone’s definition of “minority”


I was also bullied in school, was something of a loner, and made fun of at times


Children are vicious.

I will tell jokes that I find funny. Incongruity is part of humour.

You can create examples that make almost any behaviour problematic. That doesn’t mean that all behaviour is problematic but that life is a lot more nuanced.

Jokes about homosexuality can be funny, just like jokes about disabilities, race, stereotypes, aristocrats,


Would you say that jokes about incest are acceptable? Probably not, but I can point you at a one liner that I laugh at where that is part of the joke.

Are we going to self censor to the point where people are afraid to say anything because they are scared of the potential reaction?

Shouldn’t we instead try and foster a welcoming community where people can feel free to express themselves, but that if someone is offended they discuss it, and move on.

My wife and I have pet birds. I could find it offensive when people talk about killing two birds with one stone. Does that mean that we should ban idioms from the forum?

My intent is not to cause offence, but I can guarantee that at some point I will offend someone. Even if it’s just because “what do you know about
”?

As for the fact that I started this comment pointing out I am not a minority
 here is a counterpoint to that
 I was one of a group of 5 people who stayed in part of London for a couple of weeks. We walked into a supermarket on our first day there and someone immediately said “You’re not from round here are you?”
 We were in a predominantly Indian/Pakistani/Bangladeshi neighbourhood. We experienced all sorts of behaviour, good and bad, because of our race, in the largest city in the UK (in the 1990s). Does that mean I know what constant racism feels like? No, and I am not going to claim it does.

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5583

I leave this here as a little bit of inoffensive humour


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5584

That, it’s a problem. That’s a consistent reaction. It’s not all or nothing. Just be conscious. You can say whatever you want in any setting. No rights are being infringed. Just be aware so that when you make any kind of joke if someone says “that offended me, here’s some history of why” the reaction is “oh, my bad. I meant no offense” instead of lashing out with “You’re infringing on my freedom to be an asshole! You’re destroying humor from the ground up!”.

I’m not saying you personally would react in that way, but it’s a slippery fuckin slope.

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5585

Then the “problem” is if you make a similar type of joke, are you being callous or are they being over sensitive? What if something else you said also upsets them? At some point either your continued existence will offend them, or you stop talking all together.

There is a balancing act that needs to happen here. If you are truly offended then say something, but if you think that someone else might be offended you can ignore it yourself.

I am not going to attempt to justify my comments one way or another around the incident that set this particular discussion off.

I do want to encourage you all to try and get along though. We have more in common than separates us (Electrons, Protons and Neutrons for a start).

1 Like
5586

That’s an individual reaction, and I think everyone’s fine with that.
The reaction that led to the current discussion was “those “jokes” are violent agains women, sex workers
” etc., and that’s on a much more general level I think. Obviously, jokes about dead hookers are violent against women. But jokes. Like in Zwack’s example, jokes can ride on a very thin line. Joking about dead people, women, people in wheelchairs or whatever doesn’t mean anyone think this would be okay in a “real-world”-setting. That’s exactly the difference between dark humour and being a total asshole :smile:
So if you say “that joke offended me personally, because
” it’s something different than saying “jokes about dead sex-workers are not okay!”. I think. Or it’s a problem on a language level, dunno^^

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5587

For any Germans out there I present Max Raabe und Palast Orchester

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5588

Look, people made a joke. I know it was a joke, even though it hit home real hard for me. But the joke kept going, so I stepped up and just asked if we could lay off those jokes which is an obvious sign that someone’s uncomfortable. People agreed, there was an apology, everything was fine. It could have just ended with that.

I’m not here to tell you how to think or what to say. If you wanna make jokes after someone/anyone voices their discomfort in the subject, just do it in your own private spaces. I’m just trying to voice my opinion, as a member of this community, that I personally found that offensive. I shouldn’t really need to have to go into that further.

It’s not about growing a thick skin and laughing or shrugging it off. My skin is plenty thick. One benefit of growing thick skin is you find the courage to speak up against those who do you harm, instead of gritting your teeth and bearing it.

I’m not looking to cause drama or fight with people. It’s just like
 in a world where being different in many ways means being singled out, bullied and harassed, coming to a community about RFID and biohacking is one of the last places where I want to feel like I’m still the butt of people’s jokes. A simple “Hey, can we lay off those jokes?” should be enough to realize that something’s up without me having to tell you about the friends, family and loved ones I’ve witnessed being beaten, abused and killed simply because of their job.

So yeah, I personally didn’t enjoy seeing jokes that dehumanized some of the most vulnerable and stigmatized people who experience tremendous violence and abuse.

TLDR~ I’m not groupthinking y’all. Just asking us to respect boundaries of all people here should they voice discomfort about something.

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5589

So, it seems we have reached agreement, and that what we agree on is that what happened is what should happen.

  1. Someone says “Can we lay off these jokes now as I find it upsetting”

  2. We lay off those jokes.

Now, can we get back to our regularly scheduled derailments?

1 Like
5590

Whatever happened to the:

I’m rubber and your glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you?

Or the more popular:

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me?

Are these still in play or were they phased out?

^ dad humor ^ I mean no offense to anyone.

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5591

I don’t have time at the moment to jump in on this conversation and formulate a full reply, but in short I don’t agree.

There are also alternatives:-
Take a joke for what it is
If you don’t like it, move on

“It’s now very common to hear people say, ‘I’m rather offended by that.’ As if that gives them certain rights. It’s actually nothing more
 than a whine. ‘I find that offensive.’ It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. ‘I am offended by that.’ Well, so fucking what."

Stephen Fry

If you don’t like that persons sense of humour
Select their profile
image

You can also specify a time

image

If you block me, I will not be offended

This I agree with

Also this

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5592

Ima go ahead and quote your post.

I for one can appreciate the fact that you used a quote here to express an opinion without personally offending me or hurting my feelings.

These are words that are already floating around out there, that someone else said, free to offend anyone who might take offense.

This to me was genius.

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5593

Hmm, let’s see
 community history tells us

LGBTQ+ jokes :white_check_mark:
Trans people silenced when speaking out against blatant misinformation about trans issues :white_check_mark:
Child molestation jokes :white_check_mark:
Dead sex worker jokes :white_check_mark:
ACAB memes :x:

No wonder so many people butt heads with you, Pilgrim.

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5594

Difference of opinion is one thing, you and pilgrim both had semi valid points, pilgrim suggested that there would be little point in the conversation other than drama

Then you drop this shit

Which neutralizes any point you try to make in my book,

I see no further point in hearing from you

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5595

That was not out of the blue, it was based on a history of experiences with pilgrim. You can feel free to block her like he suggested with no repurcussions though

5596

Ignoring the top 4 as I can’t and won’t speak to number 2 and 1, 3 and 4 are Jokes by your admission.

The last one is not claimed to be a joke, is a generalisation of an entire group of people, and usually directs violence towards that group.

While I do have many issues with some police forces and officers I disagree with the over generalization that is ACAB.

So, I personally find such generalisations offensive, now you know.

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5597

Perhaps something non humourous for a change
 Anyone else like these guys?

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5598

image
image564×797 48.2 KB

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