Ha, well I saw you typing. But I figured there would be a paragraph for how long it showed you doing that.
How many times do you reread what you write?
Just Easily Distracted
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Back door is the same as the front, windows are standard double pane, and house is made of house. Far easier to kick in the door to move to the next level.
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And if you are home, you also have the Walther PPQ (and I imagine a buch more ) to greet them with.
Maybe a claymore!?
'murica
I would never have anything passive / automatic be lethal / damaging, only discouraging / informative.
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What about a gas flamehrower? Not pointing at the intruder, of course. Like they had them for stage decor at rock concerts. You know, active deterrence
Thirty years ago the engineering firm Iām with did the mechanical design for a university basketball stadium. The owner insisted on automatic water cannons as part of the fire suppression system. Our project mechanical engineer strongly recommended against it and put it in writing. Water cannons it was.
Twenty years later the system malfunctioned and destroyed the wood floor. The attorneys for the university came calling. We gave them a copy of the letter.
The moral of this story is that the odds of scaring an intruder are slim. The odds of hurting someone or burning down my house are much greater.
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Of course, meant as a joke. It would be a huge fire hazard and a liability
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I was also just joking about the claymoreā¦ I mean you need a lot of space to swing a swordā¦ not exactly a CQB weapon 
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I kinda just assumed you meant the antipersonnel mine 
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That was my intent, and lead you down that pathā¦ to my shit punchline
I am clearly a not a comedian
It was a layered joke.
Also a slight dig at American mentality
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Off-topic but:
My god, I find that level of access to weaponry just mind-boggling. I live in one of the countries with the most liberal gun laws in Europe, and itās nowhere close to America.
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Correctā¦
Sorry, that was another joke fail
America definitely have a unique outlookā¦
But I do get it, If I lived there, I would have an armory also.
Bad guys got 'em, you gotta have 'em!
Iām just glad I live where I dont need any, unless I want to go hunting, and I would prefer to do that with a bow because I see that as more sporting
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ā¦but THIS is the off-topic?
Off-topic is the on topic around here
Iām making an assumption of a miscommunication hereā¦
But no we donāt actually have access to functional and legal claymore anti personnel mines
ā¦ this disappoints me
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haha, what about the swords
and what about plastic explosives, ball-bearings, detonator caps and machining tools?
Kinda the Off topic paradox
I live in a country with very strict laws on weapons, and Iām pretty happy about thatā¦
My dad died some weeks ago, and so I inherited several guns (he was a huntsman, so he was allowed to have them), and they made me very uncomfortable. Iām totally fine with knives, swords, whatever, but guns just freak me out - didnāt know that until now, but they do. And I guess thatās at least partly because they are not usual around here, so I donāt know anything about how to handle them, and that scares me.
And I guess only very few people who grow up here can really understand the weapon laws in the US - it just feels really wrong. Iām not saying it necessarily is wrong, I just donāt understand it, and Iām happy that itās very different where I live.
I really like your humor. Totally. 
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Sorry to hear that buddy
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I specifically said legalā¦ you can make a great many things with tools and knowledge, many a thing the government would frown upon
(technically there is a legal means of legally owning an explosive device, but really itās so restrictive that you pretty much donāt)
Is that a serious question? I think maybe only California would bar you from owning a sword
(Everything is illegal in California, and it coincidentally also gives you cancer)
99% of sword stuff I know about itās all about having it in public, I think in some areas itās not so much ālegalā as so hilariously overlooked that itās not technically illegal